Well, it is reprupose or die day... My garage has been repurposed into my sewing room. Last night we got a table from My Grrls Gramma, that will be repuposed as a cutting table. Totally awesome. It has a leaf in it, so it has a line that I can use to make straight cuts! I was even thinking about how to add a tape measure in such a way that when the leaf is in and when it is out, it is still accurate. I am still working on that.
Last night was Lammas. Not exactly sure what that is, and I am kinda embarrassed by that... I just know that it was the bread holiday! We got bread and cheese last night, and it was good. My eyes were bigger than my tummy, partially, I think, because I am getting a cold, despite the good fight, I think that My Grrrl and I both are... :( Lame!
Yesterday I found an email from her that shall not be named in my spam, from over a week ago. Haha, I spammed her! I wouldn't have even found it if I had not been looking for my Pottermore information. That still bugs me that I cannot remember it and cannot find it! UGH
Then last night, there were phone calls from her. I do not want her invading our lives anymore. I try my best to not let it get to me, to put on a brave front, smile, fight the good fight... Don't let her in anymore than she was. She has been banished, she needs to stay banished.
I have been fighting against feelings of resentment about the past months. My Grrrl feels like she was used to get to me. I feel like I was used by My Grrrl to get to her. I hate that I feel that way, and I am trying to fight it. I think that I know logically that is not it. I mean, I don't think that is what she intended, but nonetheless, that is how I feel, and that is my current struggle. I have a hard time talking to My Grrl about it because she gets into a funk when we talk about this kind of stuff, so that is why I vent it here. I need to get it off my chest, not necessarily talk to her about it, because other than her telling me that is not the case, I don't see what more she can do besides love me, which she does... :)
Well, I guess that is it. My head hurts, I am full of snot and my eyes are itchy! even if it is just allergies, it sucks!
I can't wait for this day to be over! Home to My Grrl, My Love, My Soulmate... :)
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