Holy Cow!!!

Holy Cow! What a night this is turning out to be...I am following an idiot! I am cleaning up after said idiot! I am training someone, who has lots of questions, that is good I suppose. At least this person is eager to learn? At least there are no nurses here tonight that I can't stand. That is something. The charge is mellow. The charge will let me get away with crocheting at the desk. Woohoo for the charge!

Hopefully this night will calm down soon, I have been harrassed by the phone since I got here... Hopefully that will stop too! I did get good news earlier, I don't have to be on call Saturday night after all, that is awesome. I didn't want to be at work, or even have to worry that whole day that I might get called in, yuck! Saturday is library day, a much better way to spend the day, and taking Nana out to lunch too... Much more enjoyable.

Well, this will close my post, I am going to get on top of things here at the desk... I have finished most of what I am supposed to get done, and with this trainee, maybe I can get away with making her do the rest of the hard work, ha ha, evil genius laugh!

Reality Check... I Didn't Like It...

So, tonight my Grrrl went to go see an old friend after the boy was in bed. Fine, no worries, right? WRONG!

My mind did what it does, and it wandered to what she was doing. This friend and her have a history. There was a time that when she was at a friends house, there were "up to no goods" going on. She is not the only one, this is just history to the story, it's important to know.

So, the night goes by and I am not hearing from her. I got a text saying she was there, that was it.

It got to be 11:00 and nothing. I look at my phone... IT WAS TURNED DOWN.. my son's friend kept calling and I can't have that going on at work, so I turned it all the way down, with the intent of turning it back up when he stopped calling. He calls over and over and doesn't leave a message. I forgot to turn it back up!

Anyhow, I told me Grrrl that is what happened, I also let her know that I was not as strong as I thought that I was. That I was not ready for her to be going over there, with circumstances so reminiscent of before. She totally understood. She felt bad that I went through that. It is not her fault. She didn't know I was having issues, because I didn't tell her. I was trying to be strong and get over it.

The night before the friend had texted to tell my Grrrl that she was locked out of her apartment, then that she was back in, and then that she was bored. Never asking for anything from my Grrrl, but I feel like she is digging for the offer. Then, my Grrrl said that she felt guilty that she was not going over there to keep her company. I rationally ( I think... ) tried to talk to her about it. Explained that if her friend cant even ask for what she wants, maybe in fact that is not what she wants, and if she cant ask, then shes digging for the offer, and that is not good either. It kinda irritated me that my Grrrl was even considering going over there. Especially when she wouldn't go out to get a snack with me, was she really willing to go out in that weather ( which is why she didn't want to get a snack ) to go see this other grrrl, and not to mention, take away from the last part of out weekend together?

I can't really explain it, and I can't even understand it. I feel bad because we both lost a friend over the BS that occurred this summer, but he was her friend first, and longest, and even before all of the unspeakable pain her put her through that summer ( not even counting my part of it... ) he was her friend, a dear if not good friend. She lost him, and now she has no friends. She feels that way. I never really thought of her as someone that would be bothered by that, she has such a hard demeanor most of the time. I forget she is a softy...

All I know is that we ha a good text & IM conversation...things are better. I feel secure again. I think that I could handle things differently next time. But who can say for sure, right?

Even my grrrl said that she won't go back, since her friend popped a beer as soon as she got there. Not cool, since she asked my Grrrl to help keep her sober. I don't know. My Grrrl said that maybe she would just have her over to our house next time. Not sure how that would go down too.

I don't want to be this jealous girl. It sucks, for me, for her, for everyone. I know that I have heard, listen to your gut. But this is not my gut, I can tell. I remember what my gut felt like when it was trying to warn me, with my ex husband. This is not like that. This is like a monster that I cant make leave. Not like a foreboding that something terrible is coming. The proof of the betrayal. None of that now. None of that here... Just the monster that wont leave!

Bottom line, I love my Grrrl and I know she loves me... We are strong, and continue to grow stronger...

Courtyard 2010

I don't know what these are, they were in a wildflower packet we got.

This is the first flower on my trumpet vine.

It is shy...

Now it is less shy,

coming out to say hi!

This is a Holly Hock leaf.

There is a fallen bloom from the crape myrtle that is on the other side of that wall on it

Thought that it looked neat!

Not sure what this is either,

same thing,

in the wildflower bunch.

It sure is pretty.

It has the strangest seed pods.

Not very much when I deadheaded it!

This is my Crape Myrtle.

We didn't know what it was when we first got the house.

We were going to cut it down, because we thought that it was dead.

Turns out it just needed a pruning,

and for the weather to get warmer!

This is what the Trunpet Vine looks like,

AFTER the flowers fall off...

I'm So Bored!!!

I am so bored tonight! There is little to no need for me to be here...I should be at home with those people that love me. Not here with those people that rub me the wrong way, and those that micromanage everything that I do! 

 

I got offered my dream job 1 week ago tomorrow. I can't wait to get over there and make it my own! I am nervous, no doubt, but it is a good nervous..."like 80% excited, 20% nervous, or maybe it's the other way around"...haha, I love the movie Armageddon!

 

Anyhow, I know that is part of why I am bored tonight, that I am excited to start my new life as a day walker, but I also know that there is like NOTHING for me to do! I even brought a Xmas project that I am working on right now, it is a crochet project, and it's huge and so it is not easy to hide, I don't even care! I have it in a paper box, and I was working on it just before I decided to blog...I will work on it again some more soon.

 

We are not really busy, as far as I go... We have 1 going out, and 1 possibly coming in, and that leaves us open for 1more. That is it. For me, that is not a lot of work...I have already done most of what I need to do for the patient leaving... I need to put it in the log book where he is going, but I don't have that information yet, so I cant yet.

 

I have prepped all that I can for the one that is coming...only three other things I need to do for him, and I cant do those until he arrives, so I have to wait on that too.

 

I have even gone around and done stuff that is not my job, checked on stuff, prepped stuff, checked on more stuff... UGH!!!

 

I can't wait to take the blankets off of the windows!!!

I can't wait for dinner to be the winddown to my night, and not the windup!

I can't wait to be home to put my kids to be each night, even though they don't really need that service anymore!

I can't wait to be able to go to every band and guitar concert, and not have to hear about how much fun it was from everyone else!

I can't wait to have a day job!

I can't wait to have my own office!

I can't wait to have the job that I have always wanted!

I can't wait to shine in that roll!

At this point though, I can't wait until this night is over!

With any luck, the way that things are going, I will be able to get this project most of the way done! That would be awesome, because it is less than a month now until the big day. And while I only have gifts to wrap mostly, I have 3 big deals that I want to get done!

 

Well, I guess I better end this now, there is something constructive that I could be doing, even if it is crochet!

 

Misty

Book Case Door... COMPLETE!!!

 Starting out...

 In Progress...

 Robert reading while we worked...  

 OK, so My Grrrl worked, and I handed her stuff...

 If she didn't get to it first!

 Almost done now!

 Finished Product!!!

 Hung up

Isn't it awesome!!!

Thanks to my awesome Grrrl, she did most of the work,and is just awesome in general!

Court Yard Exploration

I just thought that this neat lone leaf on the bricks in the courtyard,

just begged to be photographed.

Then I saw Misha,

sniffin around!

She was exploring the pumpkin flower.

Weird Stuff

This is just that, weird stuff that I have photographed...Let's see what we have here.



This is just one of those stinky trees that only seem to grow to close

to the house to be allowed.

It's a shame too, because they grow very fast and could be great trees for the yard.

Well, they also take up way to much water, is what I have been told...

So that makes them a non-option for us, in the desert and all.

Strange, how can they thrive in the desert then?

Well, either way, I can't seem to get them to grow anywhere they didn't decide.

They are stubborn like children in that way!

This is a bush on the campus at New Mexico Tech,

where my middle kiddo spends her summers.

On the last weekend we went to get her,

and of course, I had my camera.

I saw this bush, and wanted to get a close up.

These cute little furry berries..

This is a picture of one of those bushes that has the orange berries on it ( D'uh! )

I took it from the inside of our fence,

it is growing on the outside of the fence.

This shot is taken from my "pseudo compost heap",

A.K.A. Where The Grapes Grow

I like the picture, despite the fact that it is dark,

I like the shadow...

This is the toilet from the kids bathroom.

It was replaced.

This one felt useless.

We told it it was not useless at all.

We used it in the most beautiful way possible,

to grow flowers!

Flowers are a MAJOR step up from it's former life!

Now, the toilet is happy,

and prefers to be called a plant habitat specialist...

This planter, where the dead stuff is coming out of,

was supposed to be cucumbers...

that failed.

But out of the ruins...

The ever strong Morning Glories...

Growing out of cracks in the patio,

over the dead cucumber planter,

and up the broom handle!

Another Morning Glory!

That's all...

This is the fire pit cover,

and the firewood that is in it!

Just thought that it looked neat.

We love fire time!

This is grape leaves.

Partially in the shadows.

Different stages of life.

Not weird,

just different.

Kinda like all of us...

each in our own way...

There is a Jebus!

I just found a project I was working on in my locker!!! Oh, how I hate
downtime!

Sent from my iPod

OMG Really

I totally don't get why all of these middle aged women like these Twilight movies so damn much! They are over there talking about a potential sex scene in the next movie... WTF! Aren't the characters all teenagers? Wasn't the book written for teenagers?

I don't think that it would bother me so much if I wasn't bored out of my mind, if I wasn't tired, if my hand didn't hurt, if I had something constructive to do, if there we rent so many bad guys on our unit, and most of all, if one of the women over there, wasn't the biggest bitch I have ever known! I can't stand her, and I never want to see her again if I can help it. When ( not if ) I get this new job, I will give 2 weeks notice, and she will be the ONLY person that I will not miss from here! 

OK, that is all, time to make popcorn, time to see what else I can get done on one of the Xmas gifts I want to make...

BORED TO TEARS

So, I'm sitting here at work. It is quiet. Yeah, that's right, I used the Q word. That is how flippin bored I am!


I got all of my intern work done.I got all of the night work done, I mean, there is still some stuff that I need to do, but they are timed events, so I cant do them yet.
I have had dinner.
I have made envelopes for a series of Xmas gifts.
I have started on another Xmas gift that is handmade, but there is only so much that I can do at this point.
I have TRIED to read my Crochet Patterns For Dummies book from the library. But apparently I am dumber than a dummy? It all looks Greek to me! I actually hurt my head trying to read it! That was just the how to read patterns part. 3rd chapter...Intro was on how to use the book, 1st chapter was just the basics, yarn type, hook type, single crochet. That stuff, I have down, for the most part, I hardly pay attention to yarn type, I buy whats cheap and pretty, as for hooks, I grab one that feels good, we have 7 million hooks. All of this stuff that I have down, if I had read that chapter ( which I did not ) I would not know it when I was done... 2nd chapter was about gauge and garment sizes, again, didn't read it. I don't want to make clothes ( right now ) I want to learn to read a crochet pattern. So, skip ahead to chapter 3... The lower the chapter, the easier the material, right? Isn't that the theory? Well, 3rd page in and I am scratching my head, and re-and rereading things... I am not sure what I expected? I think that I wanted to be able to make the awesome things that my Gramma Bishop made for me as a child. My kids are to old for those things, but at this rate, I will be a Gramma myself before I can make a secret bank hidden in a crochet clown thing. Or a Paddington Bear, or a  generic plain barbie type doll in a frilly crochet dress... Hey, I know how to make that ridiculous frill. I did it by accident, I hated doing it... Second thought, no frilly barbie type doll dress....
I just want to make a damn tissue box cozy! I think that I can figure it out, or "make it work". I have done several things this way, they worked out OK. So, I bet I could make a tissue box cozy. But, alas, should I figure it out, I might go cozy-crazy. You know its true... as I type this Blog, I can see the pieces that I would need to crochet and how to put them together to cozy my toaster...hehehe, Evil Cozy Genius that I might be...
Heck, I bet I could figure out how to make the bank thingy too... That thing was the coolest thing ever! It was a giant canister, cardboard, and it had a label that made it look like coffee. It was so cheezy, so awesome, and of course at the bottom, was the plug, and at the top was the coin slot. Then, my Gramma covered it with this crocheted "doll" thing, Not sure how else to explain it. It had floppy legs, and floppy arms, and a  face ( Have to work on that part ) and a hat, so you could take off the hat and deposit coins. Also, the bank slid out.


Man, that thing was cool!


Besides, I think that there might actually come a point when one family has enough blankets. That has not stopped me, however, I have 2 going right now. 1 that has a quickly upcoming deadline. And one that I have been working on for 18 months almost, and I am pretty sure that My Grrrl has no hopes of it ever being completed! Oh wait, 3 blankets, because I am making one that will be tons of little blocks, crochet together. That one is going to take a wile too, but I like it because I can take it anywhere. I always have room for a small ball of yarn, and the sample block.


I wish that I had known that tonight was going to be THIS slow. I bet I could have gotten away with working on the "deadline blanket" It's kinda big, but we are so slow, I bet I could have gotten away with it.


I was supposed to teach one of the nurses to crochet tonight if we both had time. Well, I have time, and I think she does too, right now, but I just don't have it in me right now.


Hey, I'm listening to Mandy by Manilow? Now, I wanna watch "Can't Hardly Wait"... I'm not sure why I like this 70's station so freakin much, but I do. An hour or so ago, they did a disco Star Wars song. It was awesome...


I'm so tired, and bored. I wish that I could go home since there is nothing for me to do... Makes sense to me, I bet it makes sense to My Grrrl too...


Oh, that figures, I said I want to go home, there's nothing to do... Now, there are labs printing up... Gotta go hand em out...


Well, I guess that is it?


We plan on working on the bookcase door today, hopefully we will! I will like to see it all done! I'm very excited to see it! If we do, there will be pictures posted Thursday...


That is all for now. I think that I will go make some popcorn!


Yummy

Stoopid Trees...

There is no real story behind these pictures, other than I was hoping that they would turn out neater than they did.

Why I'm posting them is simple. As an act of defiance!

Ha ha trees! We won!

 

As you can see in that picture those trees were getting WAY to close to those power lines, so they had to go. So, one day, not sure why, my Grrrl and I got back there and cut them down. With a dull axe, and bent handsaw! There were many bruises and contusions, and scraps, tears, curse words, and a few times people were stuck back between the back of the shed and the debris.

  

However, now those dang trees are all drying out to be our firewood next year! 



Late Bloomin' Punkin 2010

This pumpkin didn't even start growing until like September. It was weird

This is a few weeks of growth, it got some weird fungus on the leaves.

I thought that it looks neat!

Here is the leaf from farther away.

I seem to have a thing for close ups, huh?

I think that this little twirly grabby things were neat!

This is damage to the damaged leaf!

Another neat grabby thing!

I Love My Morning Glories

This is my FAVORITE picture of my morning glories, hands down!

I love the way they are basking in the morning sun.

In a large print I have of this in the "Gallery",

you can see a spiderweb.

I love the way the colors are so vibrant and joyous.

This picture is joyous!

This is one lonely purple shamrock leaf in my morning glories.

Sometime early on in the spring, I had this shamrock plant from my Grrrls Gramma

hanging in our kitchen.

Our cat Maynard, decided it would be a great idea

to jump ON the planter that was hanging.

Well, chaos ensued, and when we cleaned up the mess

I just threw out, what I thought was a dead, or dying plant.

I tossed it into my "pseudo compost heap".

Basically it is where plant waste goes during every season except Summer.

This one purple shamrock came back, and sprouted among the green.

It was really surprising, and neat to look at!

This is a cinder block edging treatment that My Grrrl did a few seasons back.

The first year we did Johnny Jump Ups in them.

The morning glories just go where in the heck they please.

That is how they wound up here.

They didn't get much bigger than this.

Honestly, I think it is because they knew that they would have nothing to grow up.

No way to look out upon the world.

This one, and the following 2, I like because of the contrast between blurry and clear.

 I wish that I knew how I did this,

where the flower is blurry, but the leaves are not.

Same here, but, alas, I don't know how I do it sometimes.

I just do!

I like all of the grabby vines in this picture.

I also like how one flower is open and awake to the world,

and the other is not!

I just like this picture because even ugly babies need love...

 I mean, the flower has seen better days. But the colors are

still so vibrant, trying to still being pretty...

Well, how am I supposed to fix something I don't even realize is wrong?

So, I had a "breakdown" moment this weekend. Some stuff that I didn't realize was festering, was festering. So, when I realized it was bugging me, I wasn't around my Grrrl to talk to her about it, so I wrote a note in my iPod. Then, when I got home, I didn't want to ruin our evening. I guess that I figured that I would talk to her when the time seemed right. Well, the time didn't seem right until a different, but somewhat related subject came up. So, instead of talking about it, I broke down, and got crazy ( not as bad as normal ) but it wasn't good.

I would like to add, in my defense, that, the delicate subject matter that was being "discussed" when I had my "moment" might have made my "incident"worse. I was embarrassed by my vulnerability at that moment...Not wanting to look stupid in that sort of moment. That, is another epiphany that I just had.

Another thing that happened tonight, when my Grrrl mentioned that she wasn't going to get around to doing something, I guess I sounded more bothered by it than even I realized I was. So, she texted me and said it would get done. I know that she has other things to do tonight, so I should understand, but this is something that had been left over from last night, basically. And, for a split second what went through my head was "Well, you didn't get to it today, and you re not going to get to it tonight, what have you been doing all day?" Fair or not, that is what I thought. I know she is probably doing stuff tonight, laundry, and I know that she did the kitchen laundry today, partially. Anyhow, I am glad that she is doing the kitchen, I dislike coming home to a dirty kitchen, and I am glad that she is taking care of this for me, and the family!

OK, well that is all, I just spent my first break blogging this, and I still didn't my coke! UGH!

Lazy Weekend... Here's Some Holly Hocks

So, it's been a lovely ( for the most part ) lazy weekend with my family. So, I didn't have any time to post. So, here is a short and sweet one!

 

I love my Holly Hocks!

This one looks like a proud face to me,

that is why I took this picture.

I liked how the light on this was.

The color at different times of day,

makes the flower look different.

I like this one,

it looks like the flower is looking off in the distance.

I think of a pretty girl in deep thought when I see this one!

Blurry Close Up!

The pretty girl deep in thought again...

SO BORED!!!

Oh man, I am so bored today at work, I don't think that it helps that I am SUPER TIRED! I am totally loosing this battle today!

 

If I didn't have ADD before, I totally have it now. I know that makes little to no sense, but it is true. I cant get my mind to stay on the task at hand!

 

I mean, I think that I have a million other things to think and worry about anyhow, but it doesn't help that this is so NOT stimulating to my mind, that I am making up NEW stuff to think and worry about!

 

OK, well just got a text from my mother in law telling me to look at my Grrrls email... Guess I better go figure out what that is all about!

 

Misty

--

"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who come alive"

-Howard Thurman

 

Awesome!

Working today looking up claims, I came across someone that has the same name as my ex-husband. That is not the person that I was sending info out on, so I had to white out his name,due to HIPPA policy, of course...

 

It was very cathartic...

 

:)

Misty 
--

"Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who come alive"

-Howard Thurman

 

My Custom Converse

These were taken at the stream behind the cabin.

We were hiking in the stream and my shoes were wet.

I wanted to capture the fact that they are wet,

but,

I think that they just look neat here.

My Grrrl painted these for me when we first got together,

back in 2005.
Man, that was forever ago!

I can't believe that they are still in such good shape.

I'm glad they are, because they are totally unique.

No one has shoes like mine!

I took these pics to show that they were wet shoes,

but I think that they say so much more.

They look like something you would see in a gallery or something.

A "hip" gallery

(Man, I feel old writing that!)

I can look at these pictures,

and say,

 "I did that!"

I'm Mad As Hell...

I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore, has turned into "your stupid as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore" or you're mean as hell for no reason and I'm not going to take it anymore. Bottom line is, I'm not going to take it anymore.

There is a particular nurse I work with occasionally, THANK THE HEAVENS I don't work with her more often than I do…

Tonight, she is in full stride on her bitch horse. There were some labs ordered, I did my job, I checked them, I bagged them, I put the time and date on them, and delivered them to her. I AM NOT ALLOWED TO ORDER THINGS… This is very important, unless the test was already ordered and something went wrong with it. But, that doesn't include if the Dr. didn't order it for when YOU WANT TO DRAW IT. It is ordered for the time that it is ordered, and that is that.

She came to my desk looking through my trash pile asking who threw these tests away. I did. They are not good reqs. If the nurses knew these things (and when I say nurses, I mean her, she has the most lab complaints of anyone I have ever worked with) then there would be WAY less mislabels, etc. IF THERE IS A "Q" ON THE REQ, IT IS NO GOOD. How hard is that to learn!?

Anyhow, she was pissed that her tests were ordered for 0100, and not starting now, and 2200. I can only bring her what has been ordered. I told her so; I brought you everything that printed up. She said, "No, where are my 2200 tests" I told her, everything that was ordered I brought you. Again, she says no, where are my 2200s? Here is the thing, when it is ordered, unless it is ordered lab collect, it prints right here by me, less than 5 feet away from me. I KNOW IF IT PRINTS… So I do my job, which I did. She continues to argue with me, telling me that it would be helpful if I brought her everything… I DID YOU STOOPID COW. I even went over to her work station to try and show her what I was talking about, but of course she didn't come with me, she knew I was right. Well, I take that back, I am sure that she STILL thinks that I am wrong, even though she had to ask the Docs to order what she needed. Somehow, I am still wrong…

The point of all of this was that when she was being mean and snotty to me, I just threw it right back at her, with the exact same amount of ugliness. I am sure that she thinks that I was the one that was out of line and inappropriate, I don't even give a flying crap.

My baby said that I should tell her next time that she talks to me that way, that I won't be responding until she can speak to me properly. I am going to tell her I don't appreciate the way that she is talking to me, and then when she comes back at me with whatever she comes back at me with, then I will say to her "Cow (I am not using her real name to protect her privacy), I will take care of this (this being what ever she is tantrumimg about at that moment) when you speak to me more appropriately.

Neato Bandito!

So, I made this neato "charging station" for my phone and iPod.

It hangs on the side of the night stand next to my bed.

It has a space for the cords to come in the bottom of the space for each item.

It has plenty of room for my phone in one,

and my iPod in the other...

Soon after I made this, I brought home my iHome charger,

so there is no need for iPod part, but I am sure that I will find something else

equally cool to do with that pocket!

This was all in the process of making our

"hippie house bedroom"